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turning to page one
turning to page one
Lester sits at the table in sloppy clothes, eating his dinner voraciously and drinking beer from a bottle. Across from him, Carolyn picks at her food, watching him with contempt. EASY- LISTENING MUSIC plays on the STEREO. We HEAR the back door SLAM, then Jane enters and quickly takes her seat at the table.
JANE
Sorry I'm late.
CAROLYN
(overly cheerful)
No, no, that's quite all right,
dear. Your father and I were just
discussing his day at work.
(to Lester)
Why don't you tell our daughter
about it, honey?
Jane stares at both her parents, apprehensive. Lester looks at Carolyn darkly, then flashes a "you-asked-for-it" grin.
LESTER
Janie, today I quit my job. And
then I told my boss to fuck
himself, and then I blackmailed him
for almost sixty thousand dollars.
Pass the asparagus.
CAROLYN
Your father seems to think this
kind of behavior is something to be
proud of.
LESTER
And your mother seems to prefer I
go through life like a fucking
prisoner while she keeps my dick in
a mason jar under the sink.
CAROLYN
(ashen)
How dare you speak to me that way
in front of her? And I marvel that
you can be so contemptuous of me,
on the same day that you lose your
job!
LESTER
Lose it? I didn't lose it. It's not
like, "Oops, where'd my job go?" I
quit. Someone pass me the
asparagus.
CAROLYN
putting me under the added pressure
of being the sole breadwinner now--
LESTER
I already have a job.
CAROLYN
(not stopping)
No, no, don't give a second thought
as to who's going to pay the
mortgage. We'll just leave it all
up to Carolyn. You mean, you're
going to take care of everything
now, Carolyn? Yes. I don't mind. I
really don't. You mean, everything?
You don't mind having the sole
responsibility, your husband feels
he can just quit his job--
CONTINUED: (2)
LESTER
(overlapping)
Will someone pass me the fucking
asparagus?
JANE
(rises)
Okay, I'm not going to be a part of
this--
LESTER
(means it)
Sit down.
Jane does so, surprised and intimidated by the power in his voice. Lester gets up, crosses to the other side of the table to get a PLATE OF ASPARAGUS, then sits again as he serves himself.
LESTER (CONT'D)
I'm sick and tired of being treated
like I don't exist. You two do
whatever you want to do whenever
you want to do it and I don't
complain. All I want is the same
courtesy--
CAROLYN
(overlapping)
Oh, you don't complain? Oh, excuse
me. Excuse me. I must be psychotic
then, if you don't complain. What
is this?! Am I locked away in a
padded cell somewhere,
hallucinating? That's the only
explanation I can think of--
Lester hurls the plate of asparagus against the wall with such force it SHATTERS, frightening Carolyn and Jane.
LESTER
(casual)
Don't interrupt me, honey.
He goes back to eating his meal, as if nothing unusual has happened. Carolyn sits in her chair, shivering with rage. Jane just stares at the plate in front of her.
LESTER (CONT'D)
Oh, and another thing. From now on,
we're going to alternate our dinner
music. Because frankly, and I don't
think I'm alone here, I'm really
tired of this Lawrence Welk shit.